Quick Thinking Slow Moving Bungie Reps Avoid Tragedy At Sony Press Conference

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  • February 21, 2013

Some quick thinking by Bungie representatives at a Sony press conference in New York yesterday helped avoid tragedy at the historically mediocre event. The four Bungie reps, who were there to discuss as little as possible about their latest project ‘Destiny’, subtly froze almost immediately upon taking the stage.

During the Bungie presentation, the crowd was perplexed as to why only one rep of the four actually spoke, and mistook the sight-of-medusa stiffness of all four members as mere stage-fright. Only after the press conference was the heroism of the Bungie team revealed.

“We had a security breach”, said a spokesperson for the press conference. “A Tyrannosaurus made its way into the main theater, and approached the stage just as the Bungie presentation was beginning. It was too dark for the crowd to see the beast but the Bungie guys saw it coming and, thank God, knew exactly what to do. If they hadn’t completely frozen on stage, this could have been the ’93 Isla Nublar tragedy all over again.”

With the audience frozen in anticipation of Destiny and the Bungie reps mannequin-like on stage, the T-Rex left the conference room as swiftly as it came and no harm was done. Authorities are still searching for the beast, however note that its “ninja-like skillz (sic)” make it difficult to track.


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